You can learn a lot driving your teens around. Hillary B. had taught me that. After a little bit, the driver is no longer a parent, but just the chauffeur, and is allowed to hear what goes on with the teen or teens in the back seat, provided the parent stays quiet. Just listen.
I had been married before, and had two sons move through that most difficult age for boys, usually 14. My second wife brought a son with the marriage, her only son, and so as he reached the magic age of 14 and became increasingly obnoxious, I knew that for this one I had useful experience.
“One of these days, he’s going to complain about the way you breathe!” I predicted. She didn’t believe me, but I had seen it before, and was trying to make it clear that it’s a phase the boys go through, not a matter of bad parenting.
About two weeks later, we were driving the boy to something, after school, him in the back seat, she driving, me in the passenger seat. Suddenly, out of the blue:
“Mom, do you HAVE TO breathe like that?!!”
She looked at me wide-eyed, I looked back knowingly with that expression that means “I told you so!,” then she grinned, and burst out laughing, as did I.
“What are YOU laughing at?!!!” said he.
So I explained: Two weeks ago I told your mother you would soon complain about the way she breathed, she didn’t believe me, and now you’ve done EXACTLY what I predicted! You’re so predictable!”
A sullen growl and silence.
Even as they struggle in puberty to put distance between themselves and parents, find themselves and make a solid identity, declare difference and uniqueness, they are, well, predictable, at least in some things. Your teen may do it differently, but most of them do it.
At least the boys.
Hysterical!! Love real life stories!
Cool! Thanks, Patty. Truth is indeed stranger than fiction. I can’t make this stuff up!
I still breathe “like that”!